If only I could go back in time, my life could have been so much better, larger and fun.  If only I had the self-confidence, patience, and understanding that I have now, then.  I am sure that is a wish we all have had one time or another.  As such, this is what advice I would give to my 21-year-old self.

Be patient with yourself and others. Don’t hang around people that make you feel bad about yourself.  Only spend time with people that make you feel loved, cared for and safe.  The others aren’t worth the injury to your soul.

There is no such thing as perfect.  Are you enjoying yourself? That’s the most important.

Does really any one care if your laundry or dishes or done?  It’s a never-ending process.

Spend more time with your kids playing and having fun.  The chores and boring things can wait.  You will never get this time back, and yes, it does go by fast.

Don’t care what other people think.  If others don’t like it, it doesn’t matter, you do.

Go after what you want to do sooner.  It is true that if you do what you love, you never have to work a day in your life.

Spend your money on good food, good bedding, quality clothes, travel and reliable housing and transportation.  It doesn’t have to be fancy, but it is important that you like it, and you feel safe.

Do make sure to put money away for the future.  It comes fast and you will be so pleased and proud of yourself that you did.

Be generous and kind.  What you put out comes back to you, and it is a greater feeling of joy to give, than get.

Don’t lead your life by what other people want you to do. Have the courage to follow your own path, even though others might think you’re making a mistake.  Remember: Failing is never trying.

Learn to advocate for yourself in a kind and diplomatic way.  You can say anything you need to someone if you say it kindly.  It is your life, so you have a right to ask for what you need.

Take care of yourself.  Exercise, get away, read, listen to music and dance.  Whatever brings you joy.

Choose love over fear, every time.

If you find yourself acting a way you are not proud of, stop.  Immediately apologize.

Face the fear and do it anyway. You can do it! Just take one step at a time.

If you are in a relationship, always remain independent. Still have your own friends, interests, etc. Do not depend on your partner to fulfill all your needs.

Give grace to others and yourself.  We are human and will never be perfect.