When I tell people I’ve been married this long, they seem amazed and always say
Congratulations! This always puzzles me – I don’t feel this is owed to me, as I don’t see
it as such a grand feat.

What it is, and was, is taking one day at a time, and never giving up. Perseverance and
faith are what it took, without a grand plan.

This doesn’t mean there weren’t times myself or my husband didn’t want to persevere.
However, never at the same time.

Yes, we argued, separated at times, fought, yelled and swore. It wasn’t always the
prettiest or the most perfect.

However, we always calmed down and one of us would go to the other and say we were
sorry, and ask if we could talk about it, as well as why that “thing” bothered us.
Our strong suit has always been our softness towards one another and trying to
understand each other from a naturally curious place. Both of us came from families
that had not been divorced but saw that we wanted to do it better. Learning to hear and
understand each other has been key. We have always been affectionate privately and
publicly, we laugh at the same things and love being with one another. We are both
introverts, but enjoy company, and we have never competed; always urging the other on
to do their best and go for what they wanted. We have remained independent with our
own friends, interests and pursuits, but each other is our safe place.

Being married a long time is like anything else that you have interest in fostering– you
take care of it, nurture it, and continue forward even in hard times or droughts. You hold
faith in knowing, this time shall pass, and it will get better, as it always has, if you keep
walking forward.

My shoes are worn, but my heart is full.